This is a guest post from my wife, Melanie. She originally wrote this post for Biblical Woman, the blog site for the Women’s Programs at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. The post originally appeared here.

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” (Jn 13:34-35)

A few years ago, my family moved into an older house in a well-established neighborhood. One of my favorite views is looking out over my kitchen sink, because my neighbor has a beautiful red oak standing majestically in her front yard. This time of year that tree is set ablaze with every shade of red and orange. The owner of the house is a precious lady, a widow. She and her late husband were the original builders of their home and have lived there ever since. You better believe she has some stories to tell! Over the weekend, I was trying to hastily load the kids into the van with the goal of whisking them off to another practice, event, or rehearsal. I looked across the street and saw my sweet neighbor, whose hair is the same color of her stately oak, by the way, slowly walking down her driveway to pick up some trash that had blown in her yard.

Something made me stop and watch her for a moment. God brought to my mind the contrast between the two of us; me in my haste and her in her slow, intentional, deliberate motions. I knew a very busy season was ahead of me and it made me stop and reflect on my actions. I was reminded that the Lord created me for good works and to love others. However, loving others would not come naturally and good works would not happen this season unless I was intentional and deliberate in my actions, just like my sweet neighbor. Here are some ideas that have come to mind on how I want to love well during the holidays.

1. Open My Eyes– It might not be realistic to slow down during the Christmas season. Many of our jobs or family commitments simply lend themselves to a full calendar. However, I want to open my eyes to those around me. As I go, I want to love others. As I drive carpool, I can show kindness to my children. As I check out at the grocery store, I can encourage those working. As I am shopping, I can ask the clerk how her day has been. It is so easy to be task-oriented. However, I want to stay people oriented, so that as I accomplish my to-do list, I am also making an impact for Christ on those around me.
2. Notice the Needs– We have an ongoing joke in our family that goes something like this- “It’s not lost until momma can’t find it.” Yes, some people in my family are more observant than others. However, that same principle can go for the needs around us as well. Christ, on numerous occasions, took notice of a need that everyone else had ignored. He stopped to help the blind man. He stopped to help the woman with an issue of blood. He stopped to minister to the family who had lost their daughter. As I go about my days, intentionally opening my eyes, I want pay attention to observe the needs around me. Is someone lonely? Is someone discouraged? Could someone use some extra groceries or a special gift just for them? We can minister to others so deeply when we reach out to meet their needs.
3. Give Much Grace– We all want the Norman Rockwell Christmas with the perfect family gathering of laughter and well-behaved children. We want our homes to look like something out of a magazine. We want to create precious memories with our children that will last a lifetime. These are all good desires, but bad idols. In the blink of an eye, a honorable desire gets out of hand when we put it above the people in our lives and above the God who created it all. Life happens, and in our quest for perfection, the slightest inconvenience can lead to irritation. Therefore, to love well means to shower much grace on those around you, and while you are at it, give yourself much grace as well. Be quick to forgive, even the slightest irritation, for joy is like treasure this time of year. Do not exchange the Joy of the Season for the root of bitterness. God has filled our cup with grace overflowing simply by sending His son as a baby to this Earth. Delight in that grace and forgiveness and love others just as well.